Matthew 16:24-25 ESV / 5 helpful votes
Then Jesus told his disciples, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.The first thought that comes to mind when reading this scripture is Kirk Franklin's song 'Before I Die'. Some of the lyrics go like this:
RIGHT BEFORE I DIE I GOTTA, live out my dreams
so I can be what He planned for me
not just for me, but so they can see
much more of Him and less of (me)
RIGHT BEFORE I DIE I GOTTA, Love my enemies,
forgive the past and set 'em free
so I can free, free up the things
every blessing God has for me
see it's for me, not just for you
I had to learn from what I've been through
I can't go through that way again
be hurt by you that way again
It's not the end
I used to be afraid to die
I used to be afraid to try
cause I was too afraid of knowing what failing looked like
but the Son came to give me life
now I feel like I can touch the sky
I'm ready if you're ready
Get up and live right now
BECOMING SELF AWARE - That's what today's goal is. Attempting to understand what drives me. What my goals are. What my passions are. How I think and process my surroundings, my environment and my circumstances. Being introspective and honestly taking an inventory of my strengths and weaknesses. This takes and ample amount of honesty and humility.
The truth is, i'm not as good as I think I am at times. I'm probably more materialistic than I think I am. Maybe materialistic isn't the word, but I am a cheapie...lol. I worry too much about money or lack thereof, which says to God how I don't trust Him in that area of my life. Oftentimes, I find that my ambitions in life are misplaced and lead to nothing more than serving myself. I focus way to much on the immediacy of life as opposed to listening to the Holy Spirit by allowing him to lead my by faith...one step at a time. I'm fairly insecure in my abilities. Yeah, I believe that I am smart, but don't necessarily feel so smart when I'm in a room full of what I think are smart people. My head a lot of the times is a jumbled mess, trying to figure out EVERYTHING. I'm much too nosey, always trying to figure out the minute details of what God is up to.
But, I also understand that the way that I am also helps me to love and have empathy for others and have compassion for my fellow man. I don't beat myself up much because I believe that I understand God's grace and mercy, yet because of this is have to always be on the lookout for pride and complacency.
I'm just reassessing where I am and where I should be going. I'm choosing yet again, to DIE.
I am my wife's husband and my kid's Dad. I love God
1 comment:
Loved this. So much of this could have come right out of my mouth. I identified with it so much. I don't feel smart in a room full of smart people, and my head is a jumbled mess 99% of the time.
I am so grateful for love and compassion that God has given me, freely, and I know it's a gift that I can give it to others.
I just emailed Tess. I am excited to see you guys soon. :)
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